


Can I kiss you?

by SerraxAvenger



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age II
Genre: Abusive Relationships, Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Rock Band, Boys In Love, Canon Relationships, Clubbing, Dirty Dancing, F/F, F/M, Frottage, Gen, Implied Relationships, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Making Out, Modern Thedas, Multi, Non-Canon Relationship, On-Again/Off-Again Relationship, Open Relationships, Recreational Drug Use, Sexual Content, Sexual Tension, Social Media, Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-05-01
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2018-06-05 16:36:23
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 16,525
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6712705
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SerraxAvenger/pseuds/SerraxAvenger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In this fic I take a modern day Alternate Universe approach to the Dragon Age 2 setting with minor influences from other Dragon Age titles.<br/>Set in the 2000s, Hawke is in his mid 20s and attending college, with his friend Varric.<br/>He meets the characters of the games and has adventures in friendship, love, and getting his heart broken.<br/>It's a very fluffy and fun piece I write when I feel I need to relax and have a good time. </p><p>I update it with consistent irregularity, so if you're enjoying it check back for updates as this story is still active as of 9/8/2017.</p><p>With beta work and contribution credit to: Inkwell on Ao3</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Mr.No-Show

It was a frosty night in December and Garrett Hawke had a date.  
He’d met a guy at a thing for school and was meeting him here, in the cold on this stupid bench.  
  
This guy was a smooth talking Blond, who’d made a bunch of jokes and had a cute accent.  
Spanish maybe?  
It didn’t matter, because he wasn’t here, and he was likely not coming.  
  
After about half an hour of waiting he was growing impatient.  
  
Garrett checked his phone again,  
**_“No new Messages”_**.  
  
He placed it back in his pocket and walked over to the bench where they’d planned to meet.  
It was cold, a mid December kind of cold and it wasn't fair that he’d been forced to walk all the way out to this spot for nothing.  
  
“Damn it!” He said out loud as he sat on the frigid bench.  
“If you weren’t going to come, you could have at least stood me up somewhere warm, jerk.”  
The frost had settled on the grass under the bench and it crunched when he shifted his feet.  
  
He leaned back and looked up at the stars, the frozen air had made them seem larger and clearer some how. He thought back to his high school chemistry class and how refraction made this effect, or was it reflection?  
He could never remember.  
  
There was a streetlight about 8ish feet away and it made this whole pathetic scene lonelier somehow.  
“Look at you Garrett, waiting alone in a park on a bench with one lonely street lamp. You’re such a walking cliche”  
  
**_ding_**  
  
Garrett eagerly pulled out his phone hating himself a little for hoping for a message as to why his date was awol.  
  
  
**_10:39 PM_** ** _  
_****_From: 336699-1_** ** _  
_****_Body:_** ** _  
_****_“The Hanged Man Bar and Grill Invites you To Karaoke Night!”_**  
  
He put his phone back into his pocket and sighed audibly.  
“Well, I’m leaving. Sorry Mr.No-Show, but you missed out”  
  
He stood to leave dusted himself off and headed back to the path that led home.  
Normally he’d put in his earphones but he’d forgotten them at home.  
He’d neglected to go back for them because this was supposed to be a date night so he’d thought he’d be okay without.  
  
He was wearing a black canvas coat and red shirt with black denim jeans.  
So he blended in well with the night.  
He kept a brisk pace as he turned the corner to a small hole-in-the wall cafe he’d seen but never been to.  
  
There was a short line to the counter but it was warm inside so he was happy.  
When it was finally his turn he ordered a latte and a small caprese panini.  
He checked his phone again, nothing.  
  
This place was cute, it was a small cafe, with  goldenrod walls and green trim.  
There was a small cluster of tables and each with a small wooden chair.  
On the back wall was a large book shelf with a sign that encouraged borrowing while you stayed.  
  
Garrett finished his meal while playing on his phone then stood to leave tossing a 5 on the table.  
While he wasn’t certain if this was a tipping place, but he did it anyway to be sure.  
  
He headed to the door and zipped his coat before walking back into the cold.  
It was close to midnight now and he was tired.  
Digging in his pocket for his headphones he laughed remembering he'd forgotten them.  
  
After he left walking toward the bus stop he passed a few couples arm in arm, and a phone booth.  
“Who uses those anymore?” he wondered aloud as he walked.  
  
Nearing the corner there was a street musician, he stopped and listened for while.  
The guitar player was a cute girl, with a weird haircut and tattoos on her face.  
She had a stickers on her guitar, SAVE THE WHALES and VEGAN.  
  
He listened while she played a song about how an evil wolf sealed away the gods tricking them or something.  
Her voice wasn’t great but she seemed to believe her words.  
When she was done she smiled “You’ve been here a while, did you like my song? I’m Merril By the way.” From her accent she sounded Welsh.  
“Yeah, you’re good.” He said being polite.  
  
  
  
  
“I play here a lot you know” She said “No one really listens, I used to be in a band. I was back up vocalist. The lead wasn’t really into my style of music.” she looked sad but continued on with her story.  
  
“So, I went out on my own, I still sing some of the old songs though.”  
She perked up a bit  “So, here I am.”  
Leaning over she lifted a large canvas guitar case and dusted it off.  
Placing her guitar inside and throwing the straps over her chest.  
  
Garrett smiled “are you packing up? I’m out for a stroll and could use the company.  
Seeming pleased for the invitation she smiled “I’d like that, yes.”  
“So, Garrett? What has you out here in the cold?”  
“I had a date” he shrugged “but he bailed”   
  
“Men can be cruel” Merrill sighed “Well I’m glad to have met you”  
“He? Are you gay? Oh- that’s rude, you’re not supposed to ask that are you?”  
“I’m not sure how to talk sometimes, I tend to ramble.”  
She said making an awkward expression.  
  
Garrett laughed, “It’s alright, yes. I am.”  
“Oh that’s nice, well I’m sure you’ll meet a great guy one day. You're very handsome.”  
They walked for a bit and reached Merrill’s bus stop.  
  
She sat and smiled at Garrett who took a seat next to her.  
“I’m sorry, if this is weird but I have a show on the 17th. I’d like to invite you. If that’s okay?”  
She took a flier from the front zipper pocket of her guitar case and handed it to him.  
Taking it from her, he looked it over.  
It was bright yellow with a black image of a crow flying out of a broken mirror  
  
**_LIVE!!! Saturday, December 17th at The Docks_** ** _  
_****_The Antivan Crows_** ** _  
_****_with_** ** _  
_****_Merrill (Formerly of The Dales)_** ** _  
_****_Justice and The Rebel Mages_** ** _  
_****_Speed Griffon_**  
**_Doors open at 7_** ** _  
_****_15 door 10 w/Flier_** ** _  
_****_  
_**“Just say my name at the door and I’ll get the tally” she said meekly  
“Don’t worry Merrill, I’ll be there.” Garrett said with a smile as the bus pulled up  
“I’ve got to go, last run I can’t miss it!” She hugged him and flitted off to board.  
  
Garrett stood alone again and began the trek back home.  
“This should be fun, I haven’t been to a show in years.


	2. Friends and Food

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Garrett goes to class and gets ready for the show.

“I am going to die” Garrett thought to himself as he looked up at the clock in his classroom with tired eyes.  
He’d spent all night listening to Merrill’s Soundcloud learning her songs and reading.  
She was good, not great but she had potential.

He’d looked up “The Dales” and listened, she was right they weren’t her style.  
They were more CCR to her Gregory and The Hawk.  
Honestly, from their page they looked like one of those weird hippie cults, living off the land between burns.

Merrill was sweet but, they were weird. He was a little glad she’d gotten away from them.  
But it wasn’t his business, and he wanted to go home and get a nap in before the show.  
And he was almost certain his British Literature teacher hated him and had conspired to slow down time.

He pulled out his phone and scrolled through his social networks.  
He’d added Merrill and all she shared was political memes and weird “Truth” cites  
She choked his feed.

Scrolling through the feed his phone lit up with an IM:

**Varric Tethras:**   
**Hey!**   
**Bored, gonna get drinks later, down?**   
**I’m buying....?**

**Garrett Hawke:**   
**Gah! Can’t, I have that show.**   
**Are you free at 7? Wanna come?**

**Varric Tethras:**   
**7, sure. Where at?**

**Garrett Hawke:**   
**The Docks, 10 at the door.**

**Varric Tethras:**   
**The Docks? Gross.**   
**I’m Down, see ya.**

**Garrett Hawke:**   
**Cool, Don’t Bring Bianca!!!**   
**I’m not kidding!!!**

**Varric Tethras:**   
**LOL See you there Chuckles!**

He put his phone back on his desk, and was almost certain Varric was bringing Bianca.  
That guy had no chill when it came to Bianca.

“Mister Hawke?” A hard deep voice rang out from the front of the room.  
“Are you ready to join us back in class?” Professor Sten was a jerk but he was fair.  
Can’t fault the guy that, could you? He had tenure and was a member of the Beresaad.  
An order of Free Mason teachers and other professionals; tough, and fair. Everyone had their thing, it was weird. But it worked for them I guess.

“Sorry Sir.” Garrett said sinking in his seat.  
He put his earphones in and listened to Blink-182 till class was over.  
This was college, he should have more respect but he was tired and hungry.

After class was over he headed to the Cailan Theirin Student Center and ordered a lunch.  
The building was named for the son of the dean who’d died in Iraq, after his dad who died in the Gulf War. It was a super sad story, told on a plaque next to a fountain as you entered.

Garrett sat and ate his pizza and fries while he did his reading homework.  
Highlighting passages in “The Neverending Story” that were allegorical to “The Christ Myth”  
He hated that class, He was a christian and it just felt wrong also there just weren't many allegories.

Putting his book down he felt a tap on his shoulder.  
Looking up he saw a Bartrand, his friend Varric’s older Frat boy brother.  
What Varric had in style and charisma Bartrand had in BO and lack of voice control.

“Hawke! Good to see ya!” he said in a voice so loud a couple of freshmen girls turned and glared.  
He sat down at Hawke’s table and started helping himself to the fries.  
“Plans tonight?” he said through a mouthful of stolen food.

“”No, just this” he said lifting his book shaking it lightly.  
“Good God, Please don’t let Bartrand come” he thought.

“Alright, then I’ll see ya” He said belching loudly and standing up to leave dragging the chair on the floor.  
“That son-of-a... He just wanted my fries!” Hawke thought to himself as he looked at his empty plate.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Garrett looked through his closet and picked out a olive green army jacket and some khakis with a white shirt and a black scarf.  
He took them and laid them out on his bed then got into the shower.

The water was warm, and soothing. Garrett washed, brushed his teeth, deodorant and a spritz of cologne.  
He dressed and looked at himself in the mirror before texting Varric.

 

**Garrett Hawke:**   
**Varric, are you ready?**

**Varric Tethras:**   
**Yeah, see you there.**

**Garrett Hawke:**   
**Meet you out front?**

**Varric Tethras:**   
**Deal.**

**Garrett Hawke:**   
**Bartrand stole my lunch BTW**   
**You owe me food!!**

**Varric Tethras:**   
**Seen at 6:23pm**

Hawke arrived at the The Docks around 7 and stood out front waiting for Varric.  
The problem with the Tethras brothers is they were short, but most people were to Garrett.  
He wasn’t huge, but taller than normal.

“Here he comes!” Garrett thought as he saw Varric turn the corner around to the front of the venue.  
“Varric!? you brought Bianca?”


	3. The Boy at The Rock Show

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merrill's show is in full swing and Hawke meets a sexy stranger

"Bianca" was Varric’s Chevy Nova, and she was a piece of shit.  
It backfired and drove like it could die at any moment but he loved that damn car.  
Music was blaring from inside the venue, but Bianca’s motor was still loud.

Pulling up next to Hawke varric honked  
“What do you think, Hawke? Doesn’t Bianca look beautiful?”  
Hawke looked over the car it was olive green and had rust around the edges.  
It was old, but Varric seemed to love her all the more for it. 

“Hurry up and park we have to get in.” Hawke said growing impatient.  
“You’re no fun, don’t listen baby. You’re beautiful” Varric rubbed his cheek on the steering wheel and pulled away  
Bianca backfired twice before he actually got her moving  
Hawke laughed and shook his head.

Getting inside was hard, after they got past the gate they got these lime green wrist bands that allowed them to buy alcohol.  
The Docks was a shitty venue with 3 stages, a pizza place with a decent bar.  
No, Hanged Man, but it was okay.

When the got to the jam stage Merrill was just setting up, there was single stool on the stage and she was alone.

Hawke watched from the bar at the back of venue, waving to her when she scanned the room.  
Her eyes widened and she smiled weakly, she was cute up there.

She introduced herself and began to play the song about the wolf, she was more confident on stage, it was a good look for her. Hawke listened nodding his head singing along.

She began her second song, one about a man who fell in love with a star.  
When a the door opened a few late comers followed by an odd looking dude with white tattoos on his neck and 3 white dots on his forehead.

He was a thin, young looking, with thick glasses and a baby blue bandana holding back a full head of white hair.  
He was dressed in all black a dress shirt with slacks, and he had the most striking green eyes.

He stood near Hawke and pulled out a pack of Marlboro 27's  
“She’s not bad” he asked his voice was deep and gruff “Eh?”  
Caught of guard Hawke stammered “Uh, Yeah, I think so too.”  
This guy was hot, and smelled like cigarettes and cologne.

He lit a cigarette and leaned against the wall.  
“Shit, keep it together” Hawke thought to himself  
“Who are you here for?” Garrett asked captivated by the sexy stranger  
The man gestured over to the bar. Taking a drag on his cigarette, he exhaled a puff of smoke  
When he spoke.  
“Bar back” He was facing Hawke now and he could make out the glint of a lip ring.

“Nice, do you like it?” Hawke asked trying to keep the attention of the handsome stranger.  
“FENRIS! Breaks up! Get back here!” A woman called out

“Gotta get back” Fenris smiled at Hawke walking past him as he gestured a whip crack and winked.  
He hurried back behind the bar and began lifting boxes from the floor to the counter behind the bar.

“Fenris,” Hawke said to himself under his breath, “Fuck, even his name is sexy.”


	4. Speed Griffon

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Merrill, Hawke and Varric enjoy the rest of the show.  
> Hawke gets a second chance to talk to Fenris.

Garrett sat through the rest of Merrill’s set, listening intently but his mind was on Fenris.  
He watched him move around behind the bar, he could see the muscles pulling his shirt taught as he moved his hands were covered in the same white tattoos. “How far did they go?” he wondered.

Fenris looked over and caught him, he smirked and scrunched his nose.  
Garrett blushed and looked away back at the stage.  
Merrill finished her last song and took her bow.  
He clapped till his hands were sore and whistled, Merrill smiled meekly.  
Back to her bashful self, stage Merrill and real Merrill were very different.  
Hawke attributed this to her history with The Dales.

She hopped off the stage and pulled her stool behind her as Speed Griffon took the stage.  
They were a shitty acoustic EDM hybrid band.  
Who’s lead singer was incidentally; the bartender, he actually came out from behind the bar to play.  
Everyone looked awkwardly at each other as they played, Hawke noticed there were some overly enthusiastic fans at the front. “Huh? well go them.” he said sarcastically.

Varric walked back finally, his shirt was open revealing copious amounts of chest hair.  
He adjusted his belt and ordered a bottled water from the bar.  
“So, have fun?” Garrett asked  
“Well Chuckles, let’s put it this way; if I give you a ride home, you’re not gonna want to ride in the back seat.”  
He laughed and drank his water so fast the bottle crushed, then poured some on his chest and down his back.

“How you do it varric, I’ll never know.” garrett joked as Varric shook the excess water from his equally hairy forearms.

After a few moments Merrill bounded up to Hawke and threw her arms around his neck and kissed his cheek.  
His eyes darted to the man he’d just met behind the bar, Fenris was busy unloading a box of IPA and hadn’t seen.  
“Of course he hadn’t Garrett, he’s not watching you”

Turning his attention back to Merrill who was positively glowing.  
Leaning in close to his ear she shouted her voice hardly audible over Speed Griffon’s  
questionable attempt at music.  
“Come out! So we can chat?” leaning back Garrett nodded casting one last glance over at Fenris busy unloading more amber bottles.  
“See ya, Mr.Fenris McSexy-Tatts, it was real” he whispered as he turned away  
And he followed Merrill outside.

 

Sitting down at a picnic table covered in stickers and graffiti of varying quality.  
Merrill smiled at Garrett and took a deep breath.  
“So, thank you for coming! Did you enjoy the show I noticed your singing.”  
Garrett smiled “You were great, I really enjoyed your performance.”

Merrill’s eyes turned to Varric she raised an eyebrow.  
“And who’s your friend?” She asked politely

“Varric Tethras, Friend of Garrett, and you newest fan.”  
He took her hand kissing it like a knight or something  
Merrill blushed and covered her mouth with her free hand.

“How the hell does he do it? And how did that even work?” Garrett thought to himself watching Varric charm the pants of a woman he’d just met.

Speed Griffon was wrapping up, with what sounded dangerously close to an Evanescence cover.

“Oh, let’s hurry back in,” Merrill said “I’m cold and it’s almost time for Justice to go on!”  
Garrett was chilly too so they hurried back in.  
They pushed past a group of high schoolers and went in, Garrett exited at the prospect of being in the same room as Fenris for a little bit longer.

The lights cut off leaving them in darkness, a fog machine kicked on, followed by an array of blue laser lights.  
A group men had taken the stage painted with UV paint wearing UV contacts so it looked their skin was cracked and their eyes glowed.

“Well, this should be interesting.” He said with a smirk  
A bass guitar started their first song followed by a bass drum, When the lead singer walked up to the microphone in the light he was wearing a teal and silver many buckled vest with feathered shoulders.  
His hair was up in a half ponytail and he started singing in with a weird vocal effect that made it sound like he was singing with 2 voices,  
Lifting his hands to cover his face he screamed and the place flooded with spotlights.  
“Damn,” Garrett said out loud “These guys really put on a show.

Merrill leaned in to Hawke’s ear while jumping “They’re soo good! That’s Justice, he’s like this activist, but scary there are rumors he bombed a jail after his friend, or ex or something got killed inside.”  
They played fast punk rock with singing vocals. Garrett thought they sounded a little like  
Reggie and The Full Effect, he hadn’t listen to them in years but they were definitely along those lines, just angrier.

Garrett looked over at the bar Fenris was gone, maybe on break maybe off for the night.  
His heart sank a little and he was suddenly quite parched, he tapped Merrill on the shoulder and nodded his head in the direction of the bar.  
She in turn tapped Varric and gestured over to Garrett who repeated the gesture.  
Varric nodded and winked at Merrill, taking a step closer to her.

 

Approaching the bar Garrett took a seat and saw Fenris crouched down on the floor squatting while loading the wine fridge.  
The back of his shirt had pulled from his belt and you just make out white ink lines going from his lower back to beneath his belt line.

Fenris stood up and stretched then rotated popping his back, as he turned to stretch he caught Hawke staring.  
He smiled, adjusted his glasses and licked his lips before heading over to Hawke.  
“Shit he’s coming over, be cool Garrett, be fucking cool” he thought to himself as Fenris leaned his elbows on the bar directly across from him.

He smiled as his eyes scanned Garrett’s face, “Hey again,” he said obviously flirting  
“Uh-hey,” Garrett stammered  
“So, I’m not supposed to,” he said tilting his head “But, what can I get you?”  
“I recommend Young’s Chocolate Stout,” he said gesturing over to a case of black bottles of microbrewed beer with purple and gold labels.  
“They’re fantastic and full bodied, plus they use real chocolate.” He spoke with an accent, English maybe? Garrett couldn’t place it but he could listen to this guy read the phone book.  
He turned back at Garrett and used one finger to push his bangs back over glasses.

“Yeah,” Garrett replied “Give me your favorite, I trust you.” Fenris chuckled  
“A bold statement for a man you’ve just met.” he walked over to the case and took a bottle and arched his back slightly reaching for a glass, Garrett was unsure if Fenris knew how sexy he looked or not but it was so hot.

Fenris walked over to the woman from before, she was wearing a dark blue bandana and was ringing up some candy girls’ smirnoff coolers before him.  
“Fenris, you know you’re not supposed to,” she said looking up “oh...Nevermind.” She turned and winked at Fenris.  
“I can take care of that for you, kitten.” she said pushing buttons on an old register that was covered in band stickers.

Hawke paid and drank from his beer and wondered for a second if this is what Fenris tasted like. The flavor was deep, dark and sweet, and imaging Fenris’s lips made it better somehow.  
Justice and The Rebel mages was just as thrilling buzzed, but the lights were a bit brighter and the music was more internal.  
This was a good beer, he tried to commit the name to memory.


	5. Landlocked Blues

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Garrett meets Anders, and visits his mom.

It was almost midnight now, and Garrett had been at this show for like 5 hours.  
He was having a great time though, so he didn’t mind, but he was getting noticeably hungry.   
  
Justice and The Rebel mages were done playing and the stage was being set up for The Antivan Crows. Garrett had never heard of them but after the show Justice and The Rebel mages had put on he was curious and the venue was starting to fill up.   
  
He hung around for a bit, Merrill was chipper and Varric’s incessant flirting was amusing him.   
When he Finally decided that it was time for a meal, he excused himself and headed out.   
  
Hawke walked outside again alone this time, leaving Merrill and Varric inside to socialize.   
He was tired and needed a moment to himself.   
  
Pulling his coat up to his neck he walked over to the pizza window, a man was smoking not far from him.   
Garrett looked over and saw it was the man from Justice, he looked normal in the outdoor lighting.   


As Garrett ordered the man walked up to him “I saw you before,” he said.  
His voice was soft, and sweet, nothing like the voice of the man onstage, almost like another person entirely.   
  
He walked up to Garrett, and touched his shoulder, “Did you enjoy the show?”   
The touch startled Garrett, but he was too polite to say anything so he simply smiled.   
“Yes, actually. You were quite good, I’m Garrett by the way.”   
“Anders.” The man said bowing slightly. “On stage I’m Justice, but out here, Anders.”   
“Well, hello Anders, it’s good to meet you.” Anders smiled “let me buy you a slice?”   
Garrett smiled and agreed.   
  
They exchanged banter for a while and Garrett explained he was here to see Merrill.   
Music blared from the venue “The Antivan Crows,” Anders said “Shall we head in?”   
Garrett finished eating and nodded his mouth full of pizza.   
They walked in together finding Merrill and Varric, making out on a lounger in the back.   
  
Garrett looked over at the band “That son-of-a...” He said inaudibly as Mr.No-Show performed on stage.   
  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~   
  
  
  
  
The weekend was long over and Garrett was enjoying Christmas break.   
His mind often wandered back to Fenris and he tried not to make it a big deal.   
It was one guy, one time, but he was so fascinating.   
  
But he had other plans today it was a trip to his mother’s.   
  
It was just him and Mom, his father had passed away several years ago and his sister Bethany followed not long after. Carver, Garrett’s brother was deployed in the Iraq/Afghanistan war and wasn’t going to be coming home for the holidays. His mother Leandra was visibly upset by this when he asked about it.   
  
But it wasn’t all bad they did get to Skype with him briefly and had sent a care package of all his favorite things, mostly beef jerky and cheap Kirkwall beer.   
  
“Oh, Garrett I am glad you made time for me,” she said hugging him “I’ll be stopping in to see your uncle this evening, do you want me to say hello from you?”   
Garrett made a face “Gamlen? Nah, That guys greasy, he’s just gonna try to sell you diet pills, or a timeshare in Rivain, or something Mom. I don’t know why you bother with him ”   
  
Leandra sighed “He’s your uncle Garrett, and that daughter of his, your cousin, is sweet.”   
Garrett stretched out on her couch and put his hands behind his head.   
“I guess but I have plans with friends later. Varric wants to take Merrill to this weird goth club and is dragging me along.”   
  
**_Ding_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** Hawke reached for his phone, his eyes on his mother silently asking for permission she smiled and nodded remarking about kids and their phones. **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Anders Justice:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Hawwwkkkeee!!!!_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** Garrett excused himself and replied. **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Garrett Hawke:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Lol, sup?_ ** **_  
_ ** **_I’m at my mom’s._ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Anders Justice:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Shit, sorry... =(_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Garrett Hawke:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Nah, its cool._ ** **_  
_ ** **_What’s up?_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Anders Justice:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_I’m so boredddddddd_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Garrett Hawke:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_I can see that._ ** **_  
_ ** **_What are you doing?_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Do you have plans later?_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Anders Justice:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Just watching Netflix, kitties, and drinking at home._ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Anders Justice:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Plans? No..._ ** **_  
_ ** **_Why? Do you?_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Garrett Hawke:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Yeah, planning to go to Sin-13 with M and V._ ** **_  
_ ** **_Wanna come?_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Anders Justice:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Hell yes._ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_Garrett Hawke:_ ** **_  
_ ** **_9\. See ya there._ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** **_  
_ ** Garrett put his phone back into his pocket and looked at his mother sipping tea.   
She was beautiful, but so sad. He made a mental note to see her more often.   
They sat for a while ate sandwiches and watched Spiderman with Kirsten Dunst and Tobey McGuire.   
  
He leaned his head on her shoulder and closed his eyes, he never missed his mom more than when he sat with her like this.   
She began to run her fingers through his hair and sighed, “Garrett, I miss this.”   
“Me too mom.”   
Sitting up she faced him and smiled an old tired smile “I’m so proud of you Garrett, you’ve done so well for yourself, you’ll be graduating in a year and then you’ll be off.”   
Tears began to bead in the corners of her eyes, she wiped them away with a laugh.   
“Oh, listen to me,” readjusting herself in her seat “Garrett, I don’t like to see you alone, there must be someone?”   
Garrett blushed, shrugged and told Mom about Fenris, and how fascinating he was.   
She listened with a smile, “Well, dear I do hope you manage to find him again.”   
“Thanks Mom.” Garrett said hugging her.


	6. I Don't Want To Fall In Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sin-13, Isabela is introduced and fun is had by all.

Sin-13 was an old goth club in Lowtown and it was a pretty decent place, all things considered.   
Garrett stood out front with Varric and Merrill, the “not couple” while they made kissy faces at each other and Merrill giggled.   
  
Anders walked up with the dark blue bandana girl from the club; he introduced her as Isabela and she nodded and winked at Garrett texting the whole time.   
  
When they got inside the DJ was blasting She Wants Revenge and dancing, she had brightly colored cyber falls and wore a baby pink corset.   
Anders was in full Justice garb and made a beeline for the dancefloor hand in hand with Isabela.   
  
Garrett walked over to the bar and ordered a trash can punch, looking around he saw no faces he recognized and Varric and Merrill were long gone.   
“5th wheeling Garrett” he laughed to himself as he shot his punch.   
  
**_  
_ ** He looked over at Anders well, Justice and Isabela dancing and decided to join them.   
As he made his way out to the dance floor he saw a familiar white inked face, Fenris was dancing alone.   
  
He saw Garrett and his eyes narrowed, smirking he walked over to him and took his hand and lead him away from his friends. Isabela winked at him, and he smiled and winked back.   
Garrett wondered if she had set this up, “Probably” he decided as he followed Fenris to the middle of the dancefloor.   
  
Once they’d found a spot Fenris turned to face Garrett, leaned back and looked at him with this sexy wolf like gaze.   
  
Garrett opened his mouth to speak but Fenris shook his head and placed a finger over his lips.   
He ran his hands up Garrett’s arms and down his chest, moving in close.     
Garret could smell the familiar scent of cigarettes and cologne, and he closed his eyes for a moment, taking it in.   
  
Fenris was wearing a thin mesh muscle shirt, tight black jeans with cargo pockets, chains hung from his empty belt loops.He wore 2 belts one with machine gun bullets the other was a 4 row pyramid studded leather belt, both hung loosely around slender his hips.   
  
In that shirt his tattoos fully visible, they criss-crossed and traced up his chest, torso and down his arms, and down to his fingers; fingers that were now on Garrett’s hips grinding on the dancefloor.   
The UV lights made his tattoos glow a blue color, and he looked like a fucking god.   
    
    
 Fenris stood to about Garrett’s chin, and his body was slim and firm in Garrett’s grasp.   
He could feel every muscle and movement, “Fuck he’s hot” Garrett thought to himself biting his bottom lip.   
  
As if he could hear Garrett’s thought Fenris’s eyes shot up followed by his lips.   
He kissed Garrett, and he tasted of dark beer, cigarettes, and pot.   
Garrett’s grasp tightened, he was hard, and Fenris knew, Garrett could feel the smile curl on Fenris’s lips when brushed against it.   
  
Garrett’s hands wandered over Fenris’s taut body, down his waist, then to the small of his back.   
Fenris pulled away and looked Garrett in the eye, his smirk was inviting, Garrett leaned in kissing him hungrily, He had previously imagined how Fenris might taste but to have him in his grasp was overwhelming.   
  
Gasping between movements they kissed, and swayed. When the song ended Fenris backed up separating their bodies.   
  
  
He smirked and took Garrett’s hand leading him back to the couch in the front room.   
Where it was quieter, and easier to talk, a waitress walked over and Fenris raised two fingers and she nodded and returned with two tall glasses of the black beer and 2 shots of an amber liquid Garrett hoped was whiskey.   
  
Combichrist blaired over the speakers and Fenris wordlessly lifted the shot glass with a smile, and nodded.   
Garrett lifted the other returning the gesture, they did the shots “ah, rum”  Garrett thought to himself.   
  
They chased the shot with the black beer, and Fenris leaned back and dug around in his cargo pocket producing a pipe and bag of weed.  Packing a bowl and lighting up, then offering the pipe to Garrett. It had been a while since he’d smoked but to avoid looking lame he took a few hits.   
  
Garrett’s head was swimmy and he was unsure if it was the effect of the pot, or Fenris’s proximity. He passed the pipe back to Fenris while trying to decide which was more intoxicating.   
  
Fenris smiled, and cleaned the bowl into an ashtray that sat on the table next to the couch.   
Looking back at Garrett still smiling he stretched popping his back, then his knuckles.   
  
“So, Garrett, long time no see,” he said playfully licking his lips “whatcha been up to?”   
Garrett scratched his beard, choosing his words carefully, “ Oh, you know, saving the world, rescuing kittens out of trees.” Fenris laughed “well then, I know who to call when I need my kitten rescued.” His accent was thicker when he was inebriated, and his voice sounded like fucking satin.   
  
Garrett took another drink, and held it in his mouth for a moment his eyes still on Fenris.   
He swallowed hard, and decided that it was now his favorite.   
Fenris put the pipe back in his pocket and dug out his cigarettes and lit one, taking a long drag.   
  
He watched the ember at the end burn for a moment, and looked back at Hawke.   
His eyes looked different sad almost, but just as soon the expression appeared it was gone.   
The music blared behind them as Garrett sat relaxed, and Fenris finished his cigarette.   
  
He blinked a few times and leaned back, extinguishing his cigarette in the same ashtray as the pipe.   
Fenris looked over to Hawke with a grin and began to speak, but stopped him self with a grin.   
    
He scratched his cheek and slid over on the couch closer to Garrett and leaning in to kiss him again.   
Before their lips could meet Isabela and Anders stumbled up to them, Fenris leaned back and Garrett could swear he heard him growl.   
  
Anders and Isabela sat in the chairs around the table and Isabela started smoking.   
“Having fun you two?” she said with a grin.   
  
Garrett blushed and looked at Fenris who winked at Isabela. “It was a setup” Garrett thought to himself as he reminded himself to thank Isabela.    
  


	7. White Christmas

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Garrett and Leandra spend a Chrsitmas together.

Garrett awoke early his back hurt from sleeping on the couch in his mother's living room.   
It was Christmas morning and he’d spent the night.   
  
A small table tree stood decorated with miniature lights and ornaments on a stool in the corner of the room and two small boxes and a bag for each of them beneath it.   
  
Garrett sat up stretched and walked over to the kitchenette still wrapped in his mother’s couch throw blanket.   
Looking at the morning light through the small window over the sink he turned and filled the coffee pot.    
  
He closed his eyes for a moment allowing the moisture to return to them, the steam from the coffee maker felt good against the skin under his beard.   
  
When the coffee was brewed he added sugar and peppermint creamer and cute peppermint marshmallows then after taking a mug in each hand he made the short walk down the hall and knocked on his mother’s bedroom door.   
  
He was a grown man but she loved when he woke her up on Christmas morning.   
  
He entered quietly, set her cup down on her bedside table, and sat on the corner of her bed shaking her awake.   
“Mom, it’s Christmas” he whined in a whisper.   
  
Leandra stirred and looked at him with a smile, “Good morning dear, Merry Christmas” she said with sleep rasping in her voice  
He leaned down and she kissed his forehead through his mass of messy hair.   
She looked over his slept in clothing and smiled, Garrett shrugged and helped her to sitting.   
  
They sat together for a moment and drank their coffee in silence as was their tradition.   
Every christmas they would sit and drink their coffee wordlessly to honor the memories of Malcolm, his father and Bethany, his sister.    
The sun shone through the sheer curtains in her bedroom and little dust particles floated in and out of the rays of growing light.   
  
Leandra took a deep breath and looked at Garrett, who met her gaze with a sort of eager expression. Hoping his mother was alright, and not hurting.   
She smiled, and Garrett relaxed a bit. He hated knowing she was in pain but he understood why she hurt.   
  
Leandra’s smile softened and she furrowed her brow, “Now, my son if I am not mistaken there is a small matter of presents?”   
Garrett smiled a big goofy grin and stood to help his mother out of bed. They made their way back down the short hall into the living room.   
  
Leandra looked it over and blew a small puff of disappointed air from her nose. “Garrett, my son, must you leave such destruction in your wake?”.   
  
Garrett looked at the living room his belongings had been strewn about haphazardly. He shrugged dejectedly and moved his backpack over so his mom could sit down.  
  
As she made herself comfortable he walked over to the tree bringing each a bag and box.   
Leandra opened her box first, inside it, was a small chain with a charm on the end in the shape of a bird, and a matching bracelet.   
Garrett smiled as she looked at the charms, “I hope you like it, I want to buy you a charm each holiday.”   
  
In her bag was a small vial of amber liquid with a powder pink pump coming off the side.   
She looked at Garrett with a puzzled expression. Garrett smiled,   
  
“I remember when I was young you’d wear this scent. I called Gamlin and asked what it was if he could remember and after he got back to me I went out and bought a bottle.”   
He hugged his mother, you’re beautiful mom, don’t forget okay?”   
  
Leandra looked at Garrett with tears growing in her tired eyes and wiping them away with the back of her hand she took a deep breath.   
“Now, open yours son. I feel you’re really going to enjoy them.”   
  
Garrett smiled and looked at his own two small packages.  
  
He chose to open the bag first and after pulling out the tissue paper he found a small black box with a silver ribbon.   
He played with the box in his hand for a moment admiring it and finally slid off the bow and pulled off the lid.   
  
Inside was a semi transparent chunk of unpolished light blue rock that had a round finished wooden base.   
He looked up at his mother eyes wide with a puzzled expression, and in a whisper finally spoke.   
  
“Mother, is this... lyrium?”   
  
His mother smiled and looked down at the rock in her son’s hands.   
  
“Yes, it was your Grandfather Amell’s. I kept it in its box in the attic for many years,"   
She turned her eyes back on her son and continued.   
  
"But you know what they say? Lyrium is magic and if you love it and show it to the sunlight even for a moment it will glow for hours.”    
  
Her voice was different when she spoke, almost mysterious.   
She really believed in this,  it made sense that it mattered to her, she loved magic.   
  
Garrett was stunned and sat silently admiring his gift. He gently returned the stone to its box and hugged his mother.   
“Thank you”, he said with a hush to his words “really.”   
  
He turned and placed the bag next to him on the couch, and turned his attention to the box.   
  
In it was a small white bundle of tissue paper and a bit of twine.  
Garrett pulled off the twine and unrolled a long red scarf.   
  
His initials GH were knitted into one side and the crest for house Hawke in the other.  
There were little knots with yarn hanging from them at each end.   
  
Leandra covered her mouth as Garrett stood and tried it on.   
It was warm and soft, he could tell it was homemade even though he knew his mother didn’t know how to knit.   
He looked over at her and she had a small smile on her face as she admired her son’s movements.   
Garrett walked back over to her and sat on the couch kissing her cheek. “Merry christmas mom.”   
  
He put his arm around her and they sat there in silence watching the two candles on the fireplace burn.   
Bethany and Malcolm.... Holidays were always hard for them.   
  
Now with Carver deployed they both knew that there may very well be 3 candles next year.   
Though neither dared say it aloud.   
  
“Alright son, I’m hungry, Chinese?” Leandra said looking away from the candles.   
“Sounds good Mom.” Garrett said taking out his phone.    
    
    


 


	8. Id Do Anything

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Garrett has a nice hot shower and meets up with Varric and Merrill for lunch and to make plans for the day.

The air was cold in Garrett’s apartment as he stirred awake with the blue light of early morning drenching everything his his home a shade of grey, that made it look as though his possessions were almost ethereal. Pulling his blanket over his head he closed his eyes and imagined the moment he’d last seen Fenris. He tried to push the vision from his mind but all he could think about were his pouty lips, and his taste. He licked his lips and rubbed his eyes, allowing the images of Fenris’s own eyes to cloud his mind. “Garrett, what are you doing?” he thought to himself as he sat up in his bed. He kicked his large fluffy white down comforter off his body and walked over to the closet and grabbed his clothing for the day. He eyes lingered over the jacket he’d worn to the club that night. Pushing it aside he grabbed a gray thermal hoodie and some fleece pants.   
  
Carrying them under one arm he walked over to the shower and turned on the water allowing the water to heat up and fill the small bathroom with a thick steam. He looked himself in the mirror as he brushed his teeth and wondered what Fenris was doing at that exact moment.  
He wondered if Fenris had thought of him. Rinsing his mouth and stepping into the shower he let his head fall as water ran down his back stinging and leaving his skin red where it had touched him.   
  
He thought longingly about the way he felt when Fenris had touched him, and their kiss at Sin.  
He licked his lips again and felt a familiar warmth in his belly. He opened his eyes and stared at his growing erection and took it in his hand. Simply holding it and squeezing gently sent small flutters of pleasure through his legs and lower back. Closing his eyes again he imagined the man’s skin, and his tongue in his mouth. He began to pump in short strong motions, He thought about how badly he’d wanted more, how badly he wanted his touch at that moment.  
  
Putting one arm on the wall to brace himself his movements quickened. He imagined Fenris’s lythe body spread out and naked in his bed. He wanted to know what every inch of that man looked like. Gripping tight as he reached his climax Garrett heaved a heavy sigh, immediately feeling dirtier than before his shower. He sat on the floor and washed his hair and beard.   
  
“Damn it,” he thought to himself as he rinsed his beard free of shampoo. He wondered if he’d see Fenris again, he knew he had to, but he feared he may not.   
  
After drying himself off he went into the living room and sat on the couch, putting on a movie and trying to pull his thought away from everything else.  He pulled out his phone and scrolled social media.   
  
**_Ding_** ** _  
_** ** _Varric Tethras:_** ** _  
_** ** _Hey, I need a place to chill for today,_** ** _  
_** ** _Bartrand needs the room._** ** _  
_** ** _Were on our way._** ** _  
_** ** _  
_** ** _Varric Tethras:_** ** _  
_** ** _Merrill misses you, let’s do something!_** ** _  
_** ** _  
_** ** _Garrett Hawke:_** ** _  
_** ** _I’m hungry, wanna get food?_** ** _  
_** ** _Tell Merrill I said hey._** ** _  
_** ** _  
_** ** _Varric Tethras:_** ** _  
_** ** _Will do, be there in 10._** ** _  
_** ** _She says hey._** ** _  
_** ** _  
_** ** _Garrett Hawke:_** ** _  
_** ** _Kk, it’s open_** ** _  
_** ** _  
_**Garrett walked over to the door unlocked it, and went to his room to put on real pants.  
When he finally decided on a pair of dark blue jeans and made his way back to the living room Varric and Merrill were sitting on his couch he had his arm around her and they were laughing about something.   
  
“You guys are too cute for words.” he said sitting on the spare lounger he kept in his living room for company. “I’m hungry Varric, where do you want to eat?” Garrett asked Varric who had to disengage himself from Merrill’s ear to answer.  “Wanna get tacos or maybe burgers?” Merrill cleared her throat, and looked at Varric with a sharp side eye. Varric sighed loudly and rolled his eyes “Sorry Daisy, Garrett, I am unable to eat tacos and burgers now that Merrill has asked me to be vegan with her.”  Merrill smiled and kissed his cheek “Yes, Varric has decided that he is going to be vegan as well! Isn’t that grand!” She said in her welsh accent punctuating each word.   
  
Garrett stroked his beard and looked at Varric with a grin. Varric shrugged and stood up walking to the door followed by Merrill.  Garrett pulled on his black jacket and the red scarf from christmas and followed them out to the parking lot, locking up.   
  
They all climbed into Varric’s car Bianca and headed out to find something to do.  
The windows were down and they air was cold, but Garrett closed his eyes and let the cold air rush by his face. This felt good it was nice to have diversion from everything.   
  
The Ataris were playing on the radio and the Boys Of Summer was peppy, though it was decidedly not summer and in all actuality quite cold. Garrett checked his phone.  
  
 ** _No new messages_** ** _  
_** ** _  
_**He put his phone back in his pocket and thought about Fenris, “Did he even have my number?”  
Hawke wondered. Cursing himself for not getting it when he had the chance.   
He cleared his throat as Metro Station came on the radio. He sang along to himself and   
leaned back in his seat. When they finally arrived at the place Merrill had chosen they got out and walked into a small cottage restaurant called “The Spoiled Princess” passing two homeless men who were arguing about whether or not this was real life.   
  
  
The place was small and dirty, and the proprietor didn’t look like he wanted to be there.   
Merrill told a story about how the owner’s father used to run the place and named it after their daughter. But they had all died in a car crash save one son who now owned the place and didn’t have the heart to change the name or close it.   
  
Merrill and Varric ordered hummus and pita chips with a tofu hot pot, and Varric looking quite defeated ordered a kale smoothie. Garrett chose something called Chick’n skewers and a spinach salad with a mint green tea. “So?,” Merrill asked leaning over to Garrett. “How are things?” she said with a warm smile. “Good, really.” Garrett said obviously sidestepping the question about what he assumed was going to be Fenris.  “How have you been Merrill?” Garrett asked “aside from making poor Varric here a vegan?” Merrill kissed Varric’s cheek and smiled.  
“Great, I’m recording a new album soon. And I’m going to be working on a track with Anders! It’s all very exciting!” Garrett nodded, glad he had diffused the situation.  
  
When their food arrived Garrett looked at his plate with an air of suspicion.  Varric was equally unenthusiastic but Merrill dug right in. “Varric the vegan.” Garrett thought to himself with a smile.   
“Now there’s something I never expected.” He chuckled aloud and tried to pass it off as a cough.  
Varric shot his eyes over and glared. “What’s so funny, chuckles?” Garrett smiled and looked down at his plate then to Varric’s and with a devious grin shrugged “nothing”.  
  
They paid their bill and headed out the door. There was a huge lake out front and Garrett walked over to the shore. Looking out over the water he saw a large tower with a small dock.   
The waves gently lapped the gravel shoreline and the overcast sky made the place look slightly ominous. There was a man standing on the pier that looked bored. Garrett walked over to him and after getting his attention asked “what’s that?” gesturing to the tower in the lake.  
The man looked annoyed, “if you don’t know, then you don’t need to know.” he said with a snort.  
“Fine by me.” Garrett scoffed feeling annoyed himself.   
  
  
Walking back over to Bianca, Garrett climbed back into the back seat. The windows were rolled up this time and the heater was on. Varric turned in his seat “So, we’re heading over to Ander’s after a while but I need to kill a few hours. Merrill wants to go to The Docks and sign up for next weekend. Then we can head back to your place?” Garrett nodded and leaned back in his seat.   
  
“The Docks, huh? I wonder if he’ll be there.” he thought to himself as the car pulled back onto the highway. Merrill put on simple plan and I’d Do Anything played through the speakers.   
Garrett smiled “fitting” he thought to himself as he watched the trees pass the windows.  
  
  



	9. Two Princes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Garrett gets what he wants... but not as he pictured it.

Trees raced by the windows of Varric’s car while they drove the highway miles between The Docks and The Spoiled Princess.  Merrill and put on Bloc Party’s Silent Alarm and it was a pleasant soundtrack to the grey late December weather, though it made Garrett feel a bit sad.  
He watched the spiny branches reaching up at the overcast sky. They looked twisted and dark, Garrett understood the feeling. He closed his eyes and let the sway of the old car, the soft vibrations, and the artificial heat lull him into a light sleep.    
  
They arrived at The Docks with Garrett still napping in the backseat. Varric shook him awake triggering a large stretch. Garrett sat up and looked around and rubbed his eyes.  
“We’re gonna go get Merrill signed up, you wanna kick back here or...?” Varric asked when Garrett was finally alert. “Yeah, yeah.. I’ll come in.” He said after a moment.  
  
They walked into the large fenced gate and Garrett looked around the empty venue. Everything looked different in the daylight. He followed behind Merrill and Varric who were walking at a brisk pace hand in hand in front of him. When they reached the doors to the main stage his heart sped up a bit and his eyes widened. “What if he’s here? How do I look? Should I say something?” Questions raced through his head as he entered the dark venue. The lights were on and he scanned the room, It too looked different in this lighting.  Trying not to look at the bar he nervously forced his attention to the stage and the large mural of a dragon that looked like it was made of blood emerging from a flaming sword. “Was that always there?” he wondered silently finally allowing himself to look at the bar. The woman from the with the blue bandana from last time was there, Isabela. She was sitting on a bar stool with a binder and a bunch of papers in front of her.  Talking to Merrill without looking up from her work.  
  
Garrett allowed his gaze to go from one end of the bar to the other trying really hard to make it look like he wasn’t doing, exactly what he was doing; Looking for Fenris.  
He walked up to the bar next to Varric. “She does the booking too?” he asked.  
Varric cleared his throat and smiled “You know chuckles, you’re not very observant. Isabela here owns the place. She runs the bar, does the booking, just about everything. She’s the captain of this ship, and her job is to make sure everything runs smoothly. Not much goes down without her say so.” Garrett noded, “huh, yeah, I had zero idea. That’s crazy.” Varric laughed “and that’s why I’m here. You’d be lost without me Hawke.” Garrett shrugged and patted Varric’s shoulder.  
“Whatever you say, Varric”. They both smiled and turned their attention back to the two women talking excitedly about something they were unable to clearly hear.  
  
  
Garrett began to fumble around in his pocket for his phone when the room was suddenly bathed in sunlight. Turning his attention to the door he could see the silhouette of a tall slender man enter dressed in all black. He watched as Fenris entered the room followed by a tall muscular man in a suit. His heart began to pound in his ears. Fenris was here, he’d both hoped and dreaded running into him, but there he stood.  
  
  
Fenris walked behind the bar and the man who had entered with him had taken a seat at a small table at the corner where the bar met the wall. He was an older man and he was very handsome in a sort of dashing way. He was muscular, with broad shoulders. He a very well kept grey beard, and stern eyes.  
  
Garrett watched while Fenris slipped quietly and quickly behind the bar, and begin to arrange items on a small silver tray.  He filled a small silver teapot with hot water and made a french press style coffee set. When he was done gathering all the various sugars, leaves, and syrups he walked over to the man and set the tray down.    
Garrett’s heart dropped as he saw the man lift his hand up to Fenris’s cheek. He watched as this man traced his fingers along the tattoos on his chin and neck. Then Fenris leaned down and kissed him,and he was finally able to tear his gaze away.    
He cleared his throat loudly causing Fenris and the mystery man in a suit to break focus and turn to look at Garrett. Fenris’s eyes widened and his brow furrowed when he realized Garrett was standing to leave. Taking to his feet quickly the barstool scratching loudly on the floor.  
Garrett’s ears were ringing as he left the venue, the cold air from the outside forcing him back to reality.  
  
The light was too bright for Garrett’s eyes and his chest was tight. He looked around in a dazed panic. Walking over to one of the red picnic tables he sat down and rested his head in his hands. “Come on Garrett, Don’t do this.” He could feel his throat tighten as he descended into a heart broken depression. The sound of footsteps approaching behind him drew his attention, turning he saw Fenris standing silently hands in his jacket pockets.  
  
“Garrett, I...”, Fenris began “I should have told you about Danarius, I’m sorry.” Garrett stood and walked over to Fenris and stopped about 3 paces away. He looked at the slender man standing in front of him and gathering all his strength, forced a smile.  Fenris wasn’t tall but he looked so, small. His eyes darted from the ground to Garrett’s eyes and back a few times before he finally sighed and let his eyes fall back to the ground.  Garrett wanted to say something, he wanted to ask why, and be angry. But he also kind of wanted to kiss him, to walk up to the man that stood before him and take him into his arms. But instead he just stood there and said, nothing, until he did.  
“It’s okay, Don’t worry.” Garrett said he pulled out his phone and looked at the screen not really for any reason, and put it back in his pocket. “Alright, well I have shit to do, so I’ll see you around.” Garrett walked past Fenris leaving him in the cold.  He walked back into the venue, hands shaking and tightening his scarf to avoid them being noticed.  
                                                              *  *  *  *      * * *      * * * *    * * *   * * * *  
  
Fenris stayed outside for a moment looking around then back at the door. He lit a cigarette and walked over to the table where Garrett had sat. He took his free hand from his pocket and felt the table for the warmth of Garrett’s body and sat in the same spot, letting his head fall into his hands. He exhaled smoke onto the table as a lump grew in his throat. He looked at the door and wondered what Garrett must think of him. “It doesn’t matter”, Fenris said aloud his breath fogging with each word. “It can’t matter... Not as things are now. I really am sorry Garrett.”  
His words were soft to the emptiness of the world around him. He put out his cigarette and headed back in.    
  



	10. Vaguely otherworldly and threatening

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Enter Danarius, he is not a good man as we all know.

Garrett walked back in his steps were heavy, and he took his seat back at the bar next to Varric.    
The man in the suit, who Garrett now knew was Danarius stared at him menacingly.    
He stood took a sip of his coffee, placed the cup back on the tray, and walked over to Garrett.   
He sat beside him, lit a cigarette and took a long drag. He looked at Garrett as he tapped his ash onto the floor. “I’m not sure who you are young man, but I assure you, you have no idea what you’re getting yourself into.” when Danarius spoke his accent was smooth, and delicate, like a man who was many generations wealthy, like the accent you hear on TV but doubt actually exists.    
“Fenris is a very particular kind of man, He’s the kind of man that will make you feel unimaginable things so quickly, and with such intensity, that you will both hate and be grateful you’ve ever met him.” He stood and extinguished his cigarette on the ground and walked back to his table and picked up his coat.   
  
Passing Garrett before leaving, he stopped and looked him in the eye; his steely blue gaze was so empty and cold it sent a shiver down Garrett’s spine.   
“He  _ will _ make you feel all these things, and there is little doubt you have already begun to feel them, but do be warned”, his eyes narrowed and his the coldness in his eyes was replaced with unabashed malice “Fenris belongs to me, and I do detest having others touch what is mine.”    
  
He turned on his heel and made his way to the door, stopping before he crossed the threshold he turned his head and spoke over his shoulder at Isabela, ”I’m taking Fenris for a walk, we’ll be back soon. I do hope you don’t mind.”     
Isabela sneered, “Fine, do what you gotta do, but his shift starts at 7.  _ And do make sure he’s back by then.”  _  she spoke the last sentence in a mocking accent and Danarius pulled his collar and left with a scoff.   
  
“Man, fuck that guy” she said after the door was shut and he was gone. She walked over to Garrett and looked him over, then focused on his eye. “But he’s right, Fenris is...” her eyes looked over at the door she began again. “...Addicted, or brainwashed or something. He hates Danarius but he follows his every command.” She walked over to the tap and poured a beer, and came back and handed it to Garrett, “It’s on the house, feel better man.” She patted his shoulder and walked back over to her paperwork.    
  
Garrett lifted the glass to his lips, and took a hard swallow and slumped down in his seat.   
“Hey Varric, can I....” Varric nodded and handed Garrett the keys to Bianca.    
“We’re gonna head out soon, why don’t you go get bianca warmed up?” Garrett nodded and finished his beer in two large gulps, then took they keys and made his way for the door.    
“Thanks Isabela, see ya this weekend.” Isabela stuck a thumbs up in the air without looking up from her work. No problem, Kitten. Stay warm.”    
  
Garrett pushed the door open and walked out into the cold in time to see Fenris and Danarius getting into the back seat of a large black cadillac, and drive away. “Man, fuck that guy.” he said to himself as he climbed into bianca and attempted to start the engine.    
  
  
  
  



	11. Nature Boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Garrett Hawke is spurned and annoyed, enter the rebound romance and all it's complexity.

Garrett tried unsuccessfully to get Bianca started, there was obviously some ridiculous trick to getting her moving that he was not privy to. He leaned back in the driver’s seat and let his head fall back, looking up at Bianca’s felt ceiling and took slow deep breaths.  
He closed his eyes and he tried not to let the events of the last hour or so bother him.   
  
“What the fuck, man?” Garrett muttered to himself. He sat up and looked around The sky was still overcast, the car was cold, and he was generally uncomfortable. Varric was much shorter than Garrett but to avoid being a huge dick, he chose not to move the seat.  
  
After a while Varric walked up to the driver’s side door and knocked twice on the window.  
Garrett slid over and leaned on the passenger’s side window.  
“Couldn’t get ‘er going, huh?” Varric said with a chuckle. “It’s okay, my baby is a very particular kind of woman.” Varric laughed to himself and began to attempt to start the car.  Garrett sat silently, admiring the curb with trying to side step the depression that was building up behind his eyes.  
  
After a few minutes and several strange noises from the engine it was clear Bianca was not going to start any time soon. Varric sighed an exasperated sigh and rested his head on the steering wheel and shrugged.   
  
He looked over at Garrett sulking in the passenger seat “I don’t know man, sometimes people are dicks.”  leaning back he ran his hands across the dash on either side of the steering wheel. “Either way Bianca is gonna need a rest, she’s not starting up. I’m going to call Anders to see if he can pick us up.”  
“Fucking fantastic.” Garrett thought to himself. “Yeah okay, that’s just what I need today. More human interaction.” Garrett remarked sarcastically.   
  
Varric pulled out his phone and dialed quickly, lifting his phone to his ear. “Hey man, we’re stuck at the Docks.----- My car won’t start.--------- It’s me, Daisy and Hawke, can you swing by and pick us up? I don’t want to take the bus.------ yeah, okay----- cool see you in a few. ----- yeah okay. -----yeah.---- that sounds awesome.----- okay see you in a bit, bye.”  Varric flipped his phone shut and put it in his jacket pocket. “He’s on his way he’ll be here in about 20.”  
“Fantastic,” Garrett thought to himself “Now I’m going to have to be social.”  
  
Merrill flitted up and climbed into the back seat and kissed Varric’s cheek over his shoulder.  
“All signed up for Saturday’s show! It’s New Year’s Eve and I go on at 9:45!”   
Varric smiled and touched her hand on his neck. “That’s fantastic Daisy. I can’t wait.”  
“Will you be coming too?” She asked looking over at Garrett. He smiled and without opening his eyes nodded twice.  
  
Anders pulled up behind them and honked. “Alright, let’s go.” Varric said quickly.  
  
  
  
*********************************************************************************************************  
Anders’ apartment was the basement of an abandoned industrial building, it had exposed brick walls and a polished concrete floor. His apartment was large and open though sparsely furnished. There was a futon in the living room and a small love seat both gave the distinct impression they had been dumpster furniture. The only natural light fought to shine through small flat rectangular windows that lined the walls next to the ceiling which worked surprisingly well.  
  
Anders sat annoyed in a large brown leather lay-z-boy the corner in a tight black turtleneck with indigo skinny jeans and black leather side zip boots. He sipped from a bright red mug with the logo of a bank on the side "Kirkwall First National" . Garrett sat on the love seat while Merrill and Varric cuddled up on the futon.   
  
It seemed like every time he saw Anders he looked different.   
It really did seem like two men inhabited the one body. “Who is this guy?” Garrett thought to himself not realizing he’d been staring until Anders winked at him.   
Clearing his throat Garrett leaned back in his seat. Looking at the clouds through one of the windows just below the ceiling. “Varric, now that we are warm and comfortable enough to speak,” Anders began turning in his seat to face Varric. “What exactly happened to your car that caused it trouble?”   
  
Varric furrowed his brow his expression one of annoyance. “Her name is Bianca, and.. I have no idea... I have to make a few calls and find out.” He pulled out his phone and flipped it open. “And the service in your dungeon sucks, I’ll be right back.” He stood to leave hand in hand with Merrill. “Fucking Seriously!?” Garrett thought to himself as the pair headed out the door. Allowing his body to rest and spread over the couch and his head to hang back.  
  
Anders walked over to the small kitchenette in the corner and made himself another cup of the hot beverage he’d been drinking. “You can help yourself to anything in my home Hawke.” Anders said stirring raw sugar into the stolen mug.   
  
“Anything you see in my home is available to you while you are my guest.” he smiled and walked over to the bar that separated the kitchenette from the rest of the space. Leaning his elbow on the corner he looked over at Garrett with a smile. “So, do you see anything you like?”

 

Garrett sat wordlessly watching while Anders walked over and sat beside him on the loveseat. “It’s good to have company.” He said leaning back and making himself comfortable. “It’s been a long time since I’ve had people over.”    
  
Anders closed his eyes and smelled his coffee before taking a drink.  Garrett looked around trying not to stare at the man that was now quite close to him. His eyes drifted across the brick walls to a series of photos that hung under a wall light in neat flat black frames. They were photos of a man with salt and pepper hair and a full beard and Anders in various locations.   
  
In the first frame there was a small picture in the center of a white mat of two men facing each other in an embrace.  The second was of their hands fingers intertwined. The next two images were of the men at a park laying on a blanket with an orange tabby cat. The final image was of a headstone with a large black feather placed on top.  
The headstone bore the name of Karl Thekla, The epitaph read:   
  
__ “May the colors be vibrant, and the music endless my love, “                                                                              
                                                                                                               “You Will Have Justice.” __  
__ __  


  
The images were beautiful Garrett had to tear his gaze from the last one. His mind was already heavy from what happened earlier at The Docks, and he didn't want to seem nosy. 

 

“Karl....” Anders said his voice barely a whisper. He repositioned himself and too a deep breath.   
“He was my life, I tried to help him, but I got there too late.” Anders looked down into his coffee, furrowed his brow, and continued.    
  
 “We were young and we wanted to change the world. It was a few years ago now, and we were at a protest over the atrocities at Guantanamo and Abu Ghraib. Riot police showed and started grabbing people. Karl got taken to a prison for questioning and he was beaten pretty bad. I went to get him...” he paused and looked at the ceiling "He wasn’t supposed to go that way.”    
  
Anders stood and walked over to the bar in his kitchen. “He died in that prison, and as it turns out someone had called in that there was going to be a terror attack... and you know how things were those days.”   
  
Garrett nodded remaining silent, “So, I got angry and well... I’ll leave the rest to rumor.” He made his way back to the kitchenette and poured himself another cup of coffee adding a shot of Jameson.    
Looking at his cup he smiled weakly. “Suffice it to say, I like the rumors.” he punctuated the thought with a sip from his mug and a smile.   
  
He walked back over and sat down next to Garrett, looked him in the eye and smiled a genuine grin. “I’m not a monster, I just don’t like when the real monsters get away with things.”   
Garrett leaned forward placing his elbows on his knees returning the grin.    
  
  
Anders’s eyes glowed when he spoke making Garrett blush. 

  
  
  
  
  



	12. First Day of My Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things take a turn in a new direction.  
> A new love interest begins to blossom and Garrett is enjoying the ride.

Garrett was tired but he had to register for spring semester and he hated it.  
He was in the empty library at the college looking over course loads for his major and this semester was going to have to be rigorous, he was not excited. 

He’d made plans for the evening and the only thing keeping him from having fun was the annoying need to maintain his education. The library was dark and quiet, more so than normal as there was usually some level of activity in this place. Today it was just him and another guy signing up for courses no doubt. 

He looked over last semester’s list and compared it to his prerequisites for his major and scrolled down a list of literature classes looking for Professor Sten’s spring course.

BUZZ-BUZZ 

The sound of his phone on vibrate was resounding in the empty library, he pulled his phone out awkwardly to silence it. Amid glares from the other student who was also trying to sign up for classes. Hawke smiled awkwardly looking down at his phone. 

2:13 pm  
From: Anders  
Body: Hey there handsome.  
Are you almost done?

Garrett smiled, he had been texting Anders more and made plans to see him tonight. He was excited all things considered. 

2:15 pm  
To: Anders  
Body:  
Yeah, did you have any idea as to what we're doing later?

 

2:17 pm  
From: Anders  
Body: I have a few things in mind.  
I want to show you something.  
<3 

2:22 pm  
To: Anders  
Body: Ha, alright then.  
I’ll leave it to you.  
A heart though?  
Are we at hearts yet? 

2:13 pm  
From: Anders  
Body: <3 <3 ;) 

 

Garrett was stupidly grinning at his phone when he noticed he was being glared at for the consistent buzzing and put it in his jacket pocket. Returning his focus to his work in signing up for classes.

*************************************************************************************************************

Walking back out into the winter sun was a bit jarring after all that time in the dimly lit library.  
Garrett had to shield his eyes. The cold wind hit the bottom of his lungs in an uncomfortable yet refreshing way. He drew a large breath as he put in his ear buds and fiddled with his MP3 player. 

“Simple Plan sounds good” he thought to himself as “I’d Do Anything” blared over the tiny speakers in his ears. He smiled as he thought of Fenris. Looking up at the crisp blue of the sky he pushed the image of the man from his mind, and headed toward the bus stop. 

Walking toward the stop Hawke’s thoughts wandered to Anders and what big mystery he has planned. They had not been seeing each other long, this would be their first time out together as more than friends. 

Garrett was excited but a bit nervous, it was time for him to move on from his not boyfriend.  
He looked out at the bright green of the grass and smiled. Thinking of Anders made things feel good, not tense like with Fenris, it was different. 

Anders gave Hawke butterflies, which were a welcome change to the flurry of angry bees that would fill Hawke’s chest when he thought of Fenris. Smiling to himself like a total goof he sat at on the bench under the stop number and let his head fall back. The sun felt good on his skin. 

 

********************************************************************************************************

Anders would be there soon, he knew it. He could feel the anxiety growing in his stomach as the minutes passed. It was almost 5:00. And he had promised to be there around then. Hawke Sat on the couch in his room and laid across the seats. He closed his eyes and thought of the first time he met Anders. 

 

How he looked like a mystical creature, with his eyes blue the color of the lyrium stone that now sat at his bed side that let off a constant haze of blue light. Hawke turned to his side and looked at the stone. It was passively glowing and almost pulsing in slow consistent fluctuations. 

 

Knock-Knock 

Hawke sat bolt upright as the lyrium flared to life almost buzzing. He looked over at the stone and smiled as he headed into the living room to answer the door. Walking over he looked though the little hole on the back on the door. There stood Anders, a well dressed man with his hair up in a half ponytail and a 5 o’clock shadow. Hawke took a deep breath and opened the door, to a smile and eager honey eyes. 

He walked up to Hawke and placed o hand on his left cheek, and kissed the right. He spoke his accent smooth and rich. “It’s nice to see you like this, finally Garrett.” Hawke smiled and closed the door behind him taking Ander’s coat. He wore grey skinny pants and a black lined turtleneck sweat and ankle boots. He looked amazing. 

“Can I get you a drink?” Hawke asked before Anders could notice he was staring. Anders looked over his shoulder “Sure, sounds good. Something warm maybe?” Hawke nodded and set off to make hot toddies. As Anders paced his dining room and looked at the various décor. 

“How has your day been darling?” Anders asked passively turning his gaze to the man in the kitchen through the small cut out bar window in the wall separating them. Hawke looked up and smiled “Oh, you know slayed a Dragon on my home from signing up for classes. It was quite heroic.” Anders smiled, “Well, then we shall call you my hero.” 

Hawke walked around the corner and handed Anders a black cup with white and grey flowers on the side. He took a sip and looked over at the double window beside the TV. 

“Do you have a balcony?” Anders asked with a nodding gesture in the direction of the window.  
Hawke nodded matter of factly as he sipped from his mug. “Shall we?” Anders responded.  
Hawke shrugged, nodding and heading over to the door and pushing the curtains aside for Anders. 

They walked out onto the 3rd floor balcony and Anders looked over at Hawke who seemed to scan the horizon looking at the tops of the trees and over the parking lot. Anders watched silently as Hawke took another drink from his cup. Anders Admired Hawke for a moment before softly clearing his throat he took another step forward and placed his cup down. He put one hand on the small of Hawke’s back. Causing Hawke to look over at him quickly. Anders smiled and looked at Hawke with lowered lids and brushed his cheek against Hawke’s. “When you’re ready I’d love to show what this sleepy town has to offer.” He smiled and walked back inside.


	13. Destiny of Love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A first Date!!   
> It's legit magical.   
> Let's fall in love with these guys!

The sun sank low in the Kirkwall sky as Anders and Hawke walked side by side down a sidewalk illuminated with shops that had snowflakes designed into the windows and Year End sales signs hung in their windows. Hake still had no idea where they were going and was beginning to wonder if Anders had any plans at all. He looked up at the stars and they were so clear tonight not a cloud in the sky. Anders looked over at Hawke and smiled. 

“Are you ready for my surprise?” he asked as they came to a dead end in the sidewalk. There was a guardrail and beyond it a dense hedge. But other wise there was nothing this far out on the sidewalk. Garrett smiled and Anders reached out his hand. Garrett took his open hand and they walked over the guardrail pushing through the dense foliage. 

Garrett smiled, at how smooth Anders was as they laced their fingers together and walked further into the darkness. The motion was delicate and natural, causing a flurry of butterflies to erupt in Hawk’s chest. He tightened his grasp lightly as a reflex, causing Anders to smile and squeeze his hand back. Anders glanced over carefully and smiled to himself. He was beginning to care about Hawke, and it showed. 

By now the last of the daylight had gone and they were alone in the darkness. Anders pushed forward to a small clearing that was glowing the same shade of blue as lyrium and the glow when Justice was on stage. “I came out here earlier and covered this in my UV paint,” 

Hawke looked around and saw a small arch way of sticks had been created and there was a small basket bottle of dark wine and a decent sized, smooth square box. Garrett looked over at Anders his face pale in the moonlight and the light from the scene before him. Anders smiled and walked forward still holding Garrett’s hand. 

Anders lead Garrett down to the area next to the basket and helped him to sit, then adjusting himself next to him on the grass. While Garrett continued to examine the art. 

The UV paint had been spread in delicate curving lines over the park of nearby trees and on the archway itself. Looking more closely you could see little leaves at the end of some of the swirls.   
It was a delicate curling filigree that Anders had hand painted, for Garrett. 

“This is -- beautiful.” Garrett said in a hushed voice. Anders looked over at him with an expression of longing. “I once walked a beach in the twilight hours in Antiva.” Anders moved in closer and wrapped his arms around Hawke’s waist resting his head on the back of his shoulder. 

“It was during the summer, and there were waves of lyrium rich krill washing up on the shore.”  
Anders closed his eyes and continued. “It was as though the stars were endless and I was wading in their light. I have kept this image in my mind and waited for the right person with whom to share this.” He kissed the skin on the back of Hawe’s neck. His breath was hot and a soft warmth lingered where his lips had met the flesh on his neck. 

The sudden touch sent chill down his spine, he felt safe. Garrett leaned his head closer to Anders and closed his eyes. “This is perfect,” Garrett thought to himself mouthing the words. Anders hands wandered back to Garrett’s locking fingers. Garrett rested his head against his new lover’s forehead as they both sat in the stillness of the night eyes closed locked in a moment. 

“Garrett,” Anders said his voice barely a whisper.  
“Hmm?” Garrett replied  
He took a deep breath as the words left his lips with a sigh,  
“Can I kiss you?” he leaned forward slightly his lips brushing against Garrett’s as he completed the question. 

Garrett Nodded, “Yes, I’d like that.” 

Anders closed the gap and rubbed his lips against Garrett’s before leaning in making full contact. His hands moved up cradling Garrett’s bearded chin 

Garrett took Anders around the waist pulling him in closer. 

Both men held the embrace kissing and caressing the other kissing slowly, taking soft breaths between each kiss. 

Anders pulled away slightly, and looked into Hawke’s eyes the pink flush on his cheeks a soft purple in the blue light. He rubbed his cheek against Hawke’s beard and pressed both hands against Hawke’s chest lightly. 

Garrett’s expression intensified as he laid back in the grass. Garrett could feel his pulse quicken and his breath followed suit. “Is this happening?” He thought to himself as his body involuntarily prepared sending blood to his extremities. 

Anders smiled and kissed him again, Hawke bringing his arms up to Ander’s face this time eagerly accepting.  
He lingered for just a moment before pulling away a smile stretching across his flushed lips. 

“I have a surprise for you.” he said in a quick excited whisper   
Garrett lifted himself onto his elbows as Anders turned and grabbed the smooth black box and poured them each a glass of wine. 

Handing the long stemmed glass to Hawke, Anders sat cross-legged and opened the box removing a small antique looking metal globe with a pointed top and 2 copper bands of metal circling the blue steel of the spherical contraption that sat atop a stone and wood base. 

Setting the item down gently in a patch of grass that had been prepared before this.   
He flipped a series of small switches on the side and pressed a button and it began to glow and spin shooting a blue laser beam into the sky. The beam split into 3 pieces at the end and made a pleasant humming sound. 

Anders made his way back to Hawke and laid his head on Hawke’s lap. 

It’s an astrarium, they’re from the north. This is a smaller version of the larger ones that ancient people spread around Seheron. Anders explained as the device highlighted star patterns in the night sky. 

Hawke laid back down and watched as the astrarium moved illumination each constellation connecting the dots as if guided by an invisible hand. Not crossing itself and beginning again if it did. 

“Which is your favorite, Anders?” Hawke asked

“Oh, I have many,” Anders said in a wistful voice. 

Hawke noticed Ander’s shift and adjusted his position so they were laying side by side.   
He looked at Anders and reached for his hand. 

Anders returned his gaze and with a soft smile intertwined their fingers.   
He leaned forward kissing Hawke again and placing his forehead against Hawke’s. 

“Thank you for coming out here with me Garrett.” Anders whispered his eyes closed.   
Hawke smiled “Of course.” 

*************************************************************************************************************


	14. Clocks

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The morning after a great date has it's questions and concerns.  
> Especially, when Fenris is involved.

Social Media, it was so new that Garrett didn’t know how to handle this.  
His eyes hovered over the “In a Relationship” box. He wanted to click save but he was nervous.  
It was an amazing night he’d spent with Anders and he was happy. 

They’d seen each other twice more since then and they are happy together. Free with their emotions. They’d all but come out and said it.

They were in a relationship. Garrett had an almost boyfriend... maybe. 

Anders first since Karl, Garrett’s first since, well, High School. 

It was all very confusing, and after what happened with Fenris, overwhelming.

So, there Hawke sat, on his laptop, in the kitchen of his tiny apartment. 

Obsessing over 3 words; “In a Relationship”. 

After a few moments more he clicked “cancel” He’d decided he’d ask Anders next time they’d see each other. 

He walked over to the couch and turned on the TV. 

A loud commercial for a local car used dealership called Tintop’s Reliable Pre-Owned Motors roared to life.  
The owner was a guy called Jevaris, he looked like a guy that was trying really hard to be trustworthy. 

He was not succeeding. 

Garrett turned off the TV and put his feet up on the couch stretching out, he looked out the glass sliding door to where he had stood with Anders. 

He went over the last few days in his mind. Hawke closed his eyes and thought back to the taste of Anders’s lips. He tasted of honey, wine and a bit of spice. 

Doing this caused the familiar flurry of tingles and butterflies in his chest. 

He smiled.

A deep sigh rushed from his chest as he rolled to lay in his side and stared at his own reflection in the darkened TV screen. 

“Anders..” Hawke said his voice a contented whisper. 

DING

Hawke felt his phone buzz in his pocket and pulled it out to check.

2:13 pm  
From:Unkown Number

Body:  
Hey

 

“Weird,” Hawke thought to himself. He never got texts from unknown numbers.  
He flipped his phone shut and headed into his room for a late afternoon nap. 

**********************************************************************************************************

 

When Hawke awoke it was late and the sun had set.  
He was sure he’d missed the chance to do anything fun. 

He wrapped himself in his blanket and went and laid back on his couch. 

DING

11:32 pm  
From:Unkown Number

Body:  
I’m going to be at the Docks tonight.  
I want to see you.  
\--------  
11:33 pm  
From:Unkown Number

Body:  
Garrett, Please come? 

Garrett looked over the messages for a moment before responding. 

 

11:42 pm  
To:Unkown Number

Body:  
Who is this?  
\-----  
11:43 pm  
From:Unkown Number

Body:  
It’s Fenris  
\-------  
11:44 pm  
From:Unkown Number

Body:  
This is my number, save it.  
And tell me you come?  
I get off at 2.  
\-------  
11:47 pm  
To: Fenris 

Body:  
Ok 

 

“Damn,” Hawke thought to himself as he stared at the ceiling. 

He looked at the clock, the flashing blue light indicating 11:56pm.  
It was going to be a long 2 hours. 

He got up and went to the bathroom and looked at himself in the mirror. 

He hadn’t shaved in a few days and his neck was itchy.  
Rubbing his hand over the unkempt neck beard he was developing he wondered if he should clean it up. 

“Damn it, Garrett” he said to himself as he turned on the faucet and watched the water run into the drain.  
Gripped the sink on either side he looked into his own eyes as the mirror fogged. 

He picked up his razor and looked it over. 

Lathering up he carefully drew long slow strokes from the base of his neck to the long growth.  
Drawing slow even breaths as he shaved to meet the hairline. 

He let the hot water wash over his hands and drew his wet fingers through his hair.  
Turning off the water he grabbed a towel and dried off. 

Placing it back on the rack he walked over to his bedroom and laid on his bed staring at the ceiling. His lyrium made his room glow, and he was conflicted. 

Turning on his side he touched the stone as it sat on its base.  
“Fenris......” He said the man’s name aloud. 

“What do I do?” Garrett wondered in his mind.  
He closed his eyes and pictured himself back in SIN and his hands on Fenris’ body.  
Their kiss.  
A lump began to grow in his throat. 

“Okay, I’m going to go, I’m going to see him and I am going to tell him we’re done.”  
He closed his eyes, and steeled his resolve. 

Garrett walked back to the living room, it was half past one now and he was ready.  
He grabbed his coat and his MP3 player and headed out the door. 

*************************************************************************************************************

When he got to The Docks the gate was closed with a chain and lock, he entered from a small black door on the side of the Pizza place where you went in after hours. 

Fenris was sitting on a red benched table between the main stage and the rest of the venue.  
He was wearing a beanie and a leather jacket.  
He was smoking, looking intently at his hands.  
And holy shit was he beautiful. 

He walked over to the table and sat across from Fenris who had looked up with only his eyes.  
“Hey” he said, the words frosting over in the chilled night air as they left his lips.  
Fenris turned his head to the side keeping his eyes on Garrett,  
“Hey,”  
Fenris bit his bottom lip  
“Thanks for coming.” 

Hawke smiled a half smile, placing his elbows on the table.  
Fenris extinguished his cigarette crossing his hands over the warm ash tray.  
“I had to see you, last time was... wrong.”  
Garrett’s expression relaxed as he rested his hands on the table folding them into Fenris’ own.  
He looked back up at Garrett who was searching him for a response. 

“I didn’t think that he would...”  
Garrett’s expression grew to show concern.  
“What did you think Fenris?” He asked quietly  
“Of that...” Fenris responded “I am not entirely sure.”  
“I had hoped...” Fenris’s words trailed off and left them both sitting in the same silence.  
“I don’t know...” his words were pained his face twisted in heartbreak “I was a fool.” 

“I’m sorry, Garrett..”  
Garrett stood and walked past Fenris without letting go of his hand.  
Fenris stood and walked with Garrett, wordlessly into the street. 

“Fenris, I don’t know what you have going on in your life,” His brow was grim as he formed the words.  
“But, you need help, that man. He’ll..” Garrett paused  
Fenris knew what was going to come next, it was what always came next. 

“Garrett, I have lived my life under the rule of his, I can’t just go changing it.”  
Hawke let go of Fenris’ hand and wrapped his hands around his waist.  
Fenris flinched slightly as Garrett’s fingers brushed over his ribs. 

“Fenris, does that man.... hurt you?”  
Fenris’s eyes widened in a sudden fright.  
“NO!” He said the skin on his nose wrinkled with anger.  
“And even if he did it’s not any concern of yours!” 

Garrett took a step back in fear, then back in closer.

“You’re wrong.” Garrett turned his gaze toward the ground.  
“But, I came here to tell you I’m seeing someone.” 

Fenris bit his bottom lip. 

“Anders?” 

“Yes.” 

“Typical.’ Fenris sneered

Fenris walked over to the curb and lit a cigarette.  
“He’s insane, and you will end up regretting you ever met him.”  
Fenris growled under his breath  
“The company you keep.” vitriol dripping from each word 

He Turned back to Hawke, “I can’t do this.”  
Garrett could feel his chest growing heavy and tight.  
“That’s fine, Fenris you don’t have to.” 

Fenris pulled up the collar on his jacket and turned sharply to face Hawke.  
“I thought you were...” he began sharply.  
“I thought you were different.” 

Garrett looked away “I thought you were single.” 

Fenris growled and punched the chain link fence next to them.  
“Fine, when that lunatic ruins your life don’t say you were unwarned.”  
He turned and walked back to The Docks cursing under his breath.

Hawke kept his eye on Fenris as the man made his way back into the black side door slamming it shut.  
Loud indistinguishable rock music tore through the morning air after a moment. 

Hawke put his earphones on and walked back to the bus stop.  
Tears began to well up in the corners of his eyes as the tightness in his chest gave way to emptiness. 

He looked at the clock  
4:32 AM 

It would be dawn by the time he got home and he needed a lot of time to think about what had just happened and what it all meant.

Of all that Hawke knew there was one thing, of which there was little doubt.  
He was in love with Fenris and that’s why he hated him.


	15. Sweet Dreams are (Made of These)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Shh... don't waste your time here...  
> just skip a head to the good stuff!

Garrett laid in his bed and watched the birds fly through the sheer curtains of his bedroom.  
It was a beautiful day and he could wait to get his morning started.

His white down comforter was warm and he buried his face in the pillows of his king sized four poster sleigh bed.

It was the one real luxury he allowed himself, a big expensive bed from the commercials.  
Something about space and memory foam, whatever it was comfortable as hell.

The heat was off because he liked getting out of bed into the cold from the warmth of his blanket.  
It was a nice jolt awake, that was in his mind refreshing and a nice transition from asleep to awake.

But today was not a day he was eager to rush out of bed.  
Today was a slow day, a rest day.

So he pulled his blanket up to his chin and curled bringing his knees to his chest.  
Closing his eyes he allowed the lazy late morning sleep to wash over him.

Fenris walked in wearing a towel, his hair still wet from the shower.  
His taut lithe body, glistened with moisture.  
Water droplets that clung to his skin in places looked like diamonds.  
Garrett looked him over and smiled.  
“Holy Shit is he beautiful.” Garrett thought to himself.

Delicate tattoos cross crossed over his arms and running down his abs.  
They accentuated his musculature and continued down beneath the towel.  
His tattoos moved with his body as he walked over to where Garrett lay.

He noticed Garrett staring and smiled, his sly grin.  
He climbed into bed next to Garrett and kissed his shoulder.

Garrett rolled over and smiled,  
“Hey,” He said in a sleepy whisper

“Hey” Fenris said kissing Garrett’s bearded chin.  
Fenris smiled and rested his head on Garrett’s chest.

The room they were in felt endless, with the morning light shining in making everything seem brighter, and more vibrant.

Garrett wrapped his arm around Fenris running his hand back and forth over his shoulder.  
He kissed his forehead and sighed heavily.

“Fenris, I’m glad you decided to stay over,” Garrett spoke his lips brushing Fenris’ skin.

Hawke’s breath rushing over Fenris’s skin cause little goosebumps to rise over his arms and neck.

The smell of shower gel and heat came off Fenris’s body.  
A warmth radiated off him, making their nest of blankets and pillow more welcoming.

Garrett half closed his eyes going in for a kiss.  
One Fenris eagerly welcomed, returning the affection.  
Fenris pressed his lips against Garretts own in a breathy gasp as their lips met.

Fenris pulled away and looked at Garrett.  
Fenris licked his lower lip, a look of hunger rushed over his face as he turned Garrett onto his back and sat on top him.

Fenris rubbed his hips over Hawke’s length, and he leaned in and kissed him again.  
Garrett’s hands ran up the sides of Fenris’s body and rested on the back of his neck pulling him in.

Fenris towel loosened exposing his form, a bead of moisture growing at its tip.  
Garrett swallowed hard and flipped him over onto his back.  
A growing tightness in his lower belly as his own arousal peaked.

He took Fenris into his mouth and began his work in pleasing him.  
Fenris reacted hard, rolling his hips and letting his head fall back with a low, audible growl of a groan.

Garrett worked his tongue over the shaft and pulled back sucking hard.  
Fenris reacted running his fingers through Garrett’s black hair.  
And down the back of his neck on to his shoulders,  
“Fuck, Garrett” he moaned gripping tighter.

Garrett had longed for the taste of the man he loved, and up until now the feelings he had were relegated to fantasy.

  
Garrett kissed up Fenris’s lower stomach as he massaged Fenris’s erect penis.

  
Licking down and taking him back into his mouth he lifted Fenris hips and parted  
him at the base working a thumb into his opening massaging him while he worked.

“Garrett, stop.” Fenris cried out.  
Garrett looked up at Fenris with a confused look on his face.  
“Too much?” he asked.  
“God, no” Fenris replied.  
“I want you in me” Fenris plead.

Garrett smiled kissing up Fenris's body  
Running his lips over the visible muscle that pushed through Fenris’s skin.  
Sucking at his nipples till they were eye to eye.

“I love you, Fenris,” Garrett said with a smile.  
“I love you, Hawke.” Fenris said in a whisper.

Separating his legs and wrapping them around Garrett, Fenris felt their forms press against each other.  
A wave of pleasure shot over them as Garrett found Fenris’s opening and pushed himself in.  
Fenris wrapped his arms around Garrett and moaned audibly as they both gave in to the ecstasy.

Garrett eased himself in, absorbing every inch of his lover, until he was able to freely work in him.  
Feeling Fenris’s body react to his presence, his body tightening up wish every thrust.  
Faster, and harder.

Fenris grabbed his hips in his hands as Garrett leaned back and grabbed the headboard and went in harder.  
Fenris reached for Garrett’s wrists and placed them on his hips and cried out.  
“More Garrett, more!”  
Garrett smiled sweat building on his brow., as he complied.

He lifted Fenris up to sitting.  
He kissed him,and bit his neck.  
Garrett cried out as he fucked him harder, and faster.

They wrapped their arms around each other and worked in sync.  
Until he laid Fenris down on his back again.

“Fenris , I’m close.” Garrett said his voice cracking through orgasm.  
Fenris looked up at Garrett, His brow furrowed as he fought for breath.

“Come in me.” he pleaded.  
Garrett let his body fall forward, as he rocked his hips.  
He kept his length deep in Fenris, Coming hard.  
The force of his orgasm triggered Fenris's own.  
He pulled himself out slowly and kissed Fenris.  
Garrett reached down and massaged Fenris’s erection.  
He worked down his body again and took him into his mouth.  
He sucked hard and slowly, Fenris resumed his ricking and growling moans.

Fenris’s body tensed up, as he neared his peak, coming hard into Garrett’s mouth.  
Garrett sucked deeply swallowing his seed.  
After, he kissed and bit Fenris’ inner thighs.

Garrett sighed a deep exhausted sigh as he laid on the pillow next to Fenris.  
Who turned to kiss him.

They laid there in the now late morning light together for another moment.

“I love you, Garrett,” Fenris said in a sleepy whisper as he buried himself in the space beside Hawke.  
Garrett smiled, “I love you too, Fenris.”

Fenris drifted off to sleep in the warmth of the their embrace.  
Garrett looked at him and thought how lucky is was that he had the love of such a wonderful man.

**BUZZ BUZZ BUZZ**

Garrett opened his eyes his room was dark and his phone was ringing on the bed side table.  
He looked at the empty bed next to him wishing like hell that had been more than just a dream.

He sat in the cold darkness of his room, alone.  
Longing for Fenris.

He checked his phone, the screen showed 3 missed calls, all from his brother Carver.  
Climbing out of bed he dressed and took his phone out to the living room and called his brother back.

“I hope everything is okay,” he thought to himself as the phone dialed out.  
“I’m sure it is,” he reassured himself.


End file.
